Mindfulness
only 8% can boast of this
- Energy
- Passion
- Self-Regulation
- Mindfulness
Mindfulness is the main source of your calm and wisdom. As applied to your sexuality, it creates a sense of curiosity and excitement.
People see you as a figure of authority and mystery. It is entirely up to you how you will use this image. But in doing so, keep in mind that others tend to look up to and rely on you.
With that, don’t forget that your erotic potential is just simmering below the thin surface of your restraint and respectability. You are well aware of when and how to let it rip, and this is probably why you tend to suppress your sexual urges far too often. Because sex is just a small part of life for you, you pay a lot of attention to other people, contexts, and situations that offer an opportunity for pleasure.
For you, sexual congress is not just the means to scratch an itch: it is a way to find meaning.
Your resource distribution chart
Your energy level
Your sexuality level
Your self-regulation level
Your mindfulness level
Meet your primary strength
Your confidence is threatened, as sexual partners often fail to appreciate or take your virtues seriously. You tend to doubt yourself and your strengths. You are used to being undervalued and do not notice when others use your resources and get satisfaction at your expense. Sometimes, you console yourself by believing yourself to be generous and striving to be above the fray. However, this state of affairs exhausts you, and many relationships become meaningless.
It delights you when others see you as an extraordinary person. You are aware that there are dark sides to this lifestyle, but you are willing to pay the price for such an exciting experience. Sometimes, in the midst of an adventure, you suddenly lose all your energy. This may upset you and shock others because they see you as a leader and a tireless organizer of parties and erotic adventures. But it appears that your own body sometimes betrays you, not wanting to participate in your plans!
When it comes to bodily experience, you feel your arousal as something joyful and inspiring, boldly succumbing to it under the right circumstances. Other people, when experiencing the same feelings, are often either afraid to admit them to themselves or rush to immediately satisfy themselves. You, on the other hand, usually take the necessary time to prepare and then orgasm with pleasure – whether with a partner or alone, without making it an issue or creating far-fetched obstacles for your own sensuality. Trust in your sexual drive, combined with a certain thoughtfulness and generosity in sex, sets you apart from others.
Origins and foundations
Your life story is filled with intriguing experiences each of which played its role in making you the sexual being you are today. Even if you haven’t tried absolutely everything there is out there, you may safely consider yourself an expert of your own sexual pleasure.
To be perfectly honest, many extravagant scenarios that you once have dreamed of now do not seem so enticing. You have allowed yourself to focus on a finite number of partners, positions, and exciting accessories that bring you the most pleasure. The feeling of renewal and energy boost after good sex brings you joy and a sense of wellbeing. If no partner is around, you can easily pleasure yourself without feeling that this is a worse, inadequate or sinful option. Prudishness is not your thing, certainly not in bed. You never let anyone’s opinions on yourself or your sex life affect your self-esteem or ruin your pleasure. Simply put, you do not believe that anyone’s opinion matters in such a deeply-personal area as your sexuality.
You know yourself well enough to easily navigate the calm seas of well-deserved wellbeing on a graceful ship of your “nearly attained” sexual dream.
When a ship springs a leak, it's time for a safe harbor
You know how to make the right decisions for yourself based on what you really want, but from time to time, you run out of energy and time to bring all your plans to fruition, especially when it comes to sex. Your high-responsibility work tasks can excite you, and the work setting provides the opportunity to meet new people and test partners in your mind’s eye. This provokes a flurry of activity, full of temptations, but it also involves routine tasks.
Sometimes you unconsciously ignore work to regain energy. Finishing the projects you have started can be difficult for you, and a perfectly conceived erotic evening may not go according to plan when you don’t have sufficient energy. At times like these, you want to lean on a trusted shoulder of a friend or partner who will get the job done for you. Instead of being a brilliant leader, you want to hide. Although you consider such behavior childish, sometimes you still need care and support, including in reaching your own climax.
Healthy body as a creed
When it comes to bodily experience, you know how important wellbeing is to you. This is why you usually consciously or unconsciously give yourself enough time to rest and recuperate, replenishing your strength and regaining emotional balance. In your case, a sexual drive can be seen as a sign of health and an indicator of normalcy. By the presence of a slight arousal, you will understand whether you are doing OK.
Your body is the source of your spontaneity and inspiration, when you are well, you are at your most charming and your effect on others is at its peak! If you have not fully understood this until now, this is the time when you should start listening to yourself. Pay attention to your gestures, movements of different parts of your body, your breathing and gaze. This will not only bring you pleasure, but will also help make you attractive to potential partners. Trust in your sexuality, combined with a certain thoughtfulness and generosity in sex, sets you apart from others.
Undervaluing yourself
You are involved in activities or relationships that are viewed as important and socially significant, but your contribution is not properly recognized. The same is true in the sexual realm, where you underestimate yourself by simply doing tasks to satisfy your partner “on demand.” It doesn’t fit your idea of a fulfilling and just life, but for now, you’ve put up with it in hopes that “time will sort things out.” Note that from other people’s point of view, everything may look okay, and, in order not to disturb your relatives’, colleagues’, or sexual partners’ sense of success, you continue to maintain the status quo. Yet, you are saddened by the way of life in which your sexual needs are ignored, even if you have enough energy and vigor to satisfy your partner. It is hard to continue living a frustrating sex life.
Perhaps the situation did not work out in your favor, and you made a mistake with your relationship, which you now regret? Or maybe the people around you fail to see your best qualities and continue to criticize you unreasonably? Whichever the case, you have come to the conclusion that you must now invest your energy and talents in something that is not really your project. Even if this project – whether a marriage, a business, or a social engagement – previously inspired you, think about it, do you now believe in what you are doing? Nothing justifies going unnoticed in such a vital part of life as intimacy and sex!
Strengths parties:
- Deep inner balance and the sense of “something bigger” in life, where sex is the source of on-demand pleasure.
- Great endurance and staying power, the ability to support someone else’s “projects” for a long time as they correspond to the desires and needs of your sexual partners.
- Your ability to show yourself from an unexpected, even vulnerable side creates an opportunity for your partner to show you attention and care when you need it.
- As soon as your energy and physical strength are replenished, your sexuality flares up naturally, delighting you and your partners.
Vulnerable parties:
- Your interest in all things spiritual and philosophical may lead you away from your physical and emotional needs.
- Self-deprecation and sensitivity to criticism.
- The feeling of exhaustion or a sudden loss of energy during your sexual escapades and/or work projects;
- You may be uncertain about your meaning and significance in relationships with partners, often, the need for them to take the lead in order to complete the projects you started or even for you to climax.
- From time to time, you run the risk of looking ridiculous and may feel embarrassed that others may take you for a naive person.
Recommendations:
#01
However rich or poor your previous sexual experience may have been, now you give it an almost mystical meaning, finding signs that all your previous and current relationships, experiences, victories, and losses were not an accident. You may remember your exes and sexual adventures with fondness, or sadness, or even anger, placing them into the context of sophisticated, meaningful stories.
In literature and film, you find parallels with your own life. Use these stories to energize yourself; do not let yourself drift into the illusionary world filled with dreams and make-believe stories. When was the last time you’ve read a truly erotic story? Maybe you have always dreamed of writing your own? Try it, you don’t have to publish it! But it’s a really great way to experiment – half of what you’ve not had the chance to try in real life you can try virtually, inviting other people to your dream reality.
Do not ignore the power of an image or written word. To be able to seduce people through your words, through your story is truly hot! This will also help you more actively engage your body in the work of achieving pleasure and bring your sexual realm out of the shadow of other parts of your life.
#02
Start with simple steps – a look, a touch, some words. Allow yourself to enjoy the beautiful things around you. Touch yourself with tenderness and pay attention to your words. Learn to have pleasure in the presence of your partners. This may be new to those who are accustomed to your support and care for them, and it will attract their attention and arouse their interest. Be as connected to yourself as you are to your partners. Relax and allow yourself to step out of the “production cycle” of serving others. You will recover quickly and will be able to enjoy your pleasure on your own or with those who are ready to please you, taking into account your needs. Practicing divided attention will make it easier for you. As a result, either your partner will learn to focus on you, or you will realize that it’s time to find a different partner.
#03
But do not panic – luckily, you tend to recover quickly. But it is crucial for you to take the time to take care of the basics. Once you start getting feedback about yourself in sex, you will need to take the time and put in the effort to plot out the route to proper recovery! Allow yourself to slow down the pace of your sexual escapades, focusing instead on the quality. You will be surprised by how much richer your sexual experience will become once you start paying attention to sufficient sleep, hydration (both inside and out, drinking and washing your body), healthy nutrition, and proper exercise. Sounds boring? Of course, you are free to accept or decline these recommendations, but they will definitely help support you when you’re tired.
Take the time to prepare for sleep and fall asleep fantasizing. Don’t neglect the moments of your morning arousal – don’t ignore them, set aside the time for them! Turn on your “sexual moods” around the time of sleep – your intimate hygiene, “self-massage,” and special toys or favorite fetishes will help you relax in the evening and wake up in the morning. Even if you live with a partner and regularly have sex, make time for your “me” moments around your sleep once in a while, to maintain your freedom and individuality. Just undressing and going to bed, getting up and getting dressed is not enough.
#04
To this end, it is worth letting go of some control and listening to your body during regular physical exertion, such as sports, sex, walking, etc. Even minutes in the shower can become a springboard for healthy and balanced contact with your body. In these few free minutes, pay attention to your breathing and try to completely free your mind of work- or chore-related thoughts. We are talking here about finding short but mandatory periods of “controlled thoughtlessness” in your schedule.
Allow letting go of muscle control while in motion or emotions when your attention shifts become as familiar a practice to you as your habit of reserve. You will surely enjoy this bodily-emotional “sport of letting go of control” as your body’s resources will begin to accumulate and sensuality develops. This emotional flexibility will allow you to be more playful with partners and productive in relationships with people.
#05
You are not in a rush – watch how people act, notice their bodies, developments, and circumstances around you. Believe me, this is almost as exciting as initiating the change yourself! Experiment with trust: blindfolded, physically follow your partner playing this game within your agreed-upon rules. Ask for caresses where you are passive and try to give yourself to your leading partner with wonder and frankness. If you come up with funny or childish images of yourself, don’t be alarmed: appreciate dress-up games and playful understatement. Sometimes this can be very exciting!
You can afford to be yourself in all kinds of different roles and manifestations. Life itself will seem more joyful and blissful – after all, it does not rely solely on your actions, and sexuality will take its rightful place. Even if you do not notice this change yourself (the general state of well-being is usually taken for granted!), people around you will begin to pay attention to your particular optimism and positive outlook on life. Unbeknownst to yourself, you will turn into a more open and calm person, ready to respond to the simple joys of life and the opportunities provided by the world around you.
You will also be less critical or judgmental about other people’s behavior – their mistakes, demands, or whims. You will be able to handle your professional and personal life with more ease. What an unexpected bonus, improved work relationships, thanks to more “planned” sex in life!
